Marriage after divorce

Being divorced is difficult. Being divorced and lonely is almost unbearable. Is this the reason that so many divorced women are heading to the altar a second time only to end back up in the divorce courts?

Often I hear, among divorced woman, is how badly they want to meet their next potential husband. Speed dating, blind dates, dating services (in-person and online), and social outings are just some of the avenues that people today are using to find love. Woman seems to spending a large amount of their time, and some of their money, to find a man.

Based on U.S. Divorce Statistics, women wait a median of 3.1 years before remarrying after a divorce. 54% of women remarry within five years. With a divorce rate of 67% among second marriages, I am asking myself if people are marrying again because they are finding people to love and love them in return or if it is because they are lonely and are so accustomed to being in a relationship that we rush to the altar without thinking.

Is it because we are used to having someone there that we are afraid to live alone? As a divorced woman, I can admit that it is hard being and living alone again. Even the task of taking out the garbage (something I didn’t have to do before the end of my marriage) would bring a sense of longing within me. Not that I longed for my ex-husband, but just for anyone to share my life and home with again.

I’ve been married my entire adult life. I’ve never lived alone before, going from my mother’s house right to my husband’s. I didn’t know what to do with myself after the marriage ended. I didn’t really know the person I’ve become as an adult because all I knew was how to be one-half of a couple.

After this time, I went from one bad relationship to another; obviously choosing the wrong men to date. I was adamant on building a relationship that would lead to marriage that I was blinded by the choices I was making. When I steeped back and stopped husband hunting, I saw the truths that were keeping me from finding love.


Have you worked through all of the emotional issues from your first marriage? Find out by taking the Fisher Divorce Adjustment Scale at

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