Divorce and self-esteem: Seven survival tips

Has divorce affected your self esteem? Find out by taking the Fisher Divorce Adjustment Scale at www.DivorceSeminarCenter.com

The process of undergoing a divorce can be devastating, and usually the reasons behind deciding to get a divorce, diverse.  The one common denominator among divorce recovery clients I have coached, appears to be low self-esteem.  Rebuilding self-esteem is one of the major components of divorce recovery work, but how is it possible to regain self-esteem after an emotional setback like divorce?  Part of the answer centers around choosing to change one’s perspective, yet the implementation can be challenging, to say the least.

Here are seven tips to help you rebuild your self-esteem:

1. Surround yourself with positive people: Negative people drag you down, positive people motivate others. So take a look at the people in your life – are they positive? If they are not positive people, I recommend limiting or eliminating your association. Seek out positive people.

2. Take Risks: Step outside your comfort zone. Once you realize that you can succeed at whatever you try, you will start to develop self-confidence. If you can’t do it alone, find a support buddy, and ask them to help you remain accountable for your actions.

3. Keep an Acknowledgement Journal: Acknowledge your self-worth by recognizing your accomplishments in writing.

4. Make a commitment to change:  You can choose to feel motivated ,or you can choose to feel discouraged about yourself and your life. What do you choose? Make the commitment to change your thinking today. Start appreciating what is right in the world, and in your life, and change the things that you don’t like or don’t want – stop being the victim and start taking action.

5. Change your Negative Self Talk: You know that voice in your head that tells you that you screwed up, that you’re not good enough or you’re stupid? Start telling that voice to shut up. I challenge you to pay close attention to what you are telling yourself; if it is negative, find a way to turn it around. You learned how to talk negatively to yourself, so teach yourself to talk positively. Believe it or not it is a choice.

6. Ask for support: If you find that you just can’t make these changes on your own, but are committed to change, then ask others for support. Find a coach, minister or support group to help you learn to appreciate yourself for all your greatness, and leave that negative self-esteem behind.

7. Take Action: Get involved in a physical fitness program. Physical activity is a great way to feel better both physically and emotionally. Make the commitment to stay in motion today, and before you know it, you will see your self-esteem skyrocket, and you may even be able to fit into your skinny jeans again- who knows? Wouldn’t hurt to find out now, would it?

By Lisa Fredette , Passionate About Life Coaching

Source: www.womensonlinemagazine.com


One Comment

  1. Posted January 14, 2008 at 4:20 pm | Permalink


    Great advice!

    Thanks for taking time to share it.

    Heidi Richards, Publisher & Editor in Chief, WE Magazine for Women

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